I've had several conversations in the last few weeks about that little awkward thing called friendship. Some of them started because of the blog I posted a few posts back, and some have been due to conversations that were happening in my Sunday morning Bible study, or around lunch tables with friends.
Today, Aaron, our Minister to Young Adults, taught pretty much everyone that calls themselves single during our SS hour. The lesson focused John 15. We talked about the whole section where Jesus tells us He is the Vine and we are branches. One of the points he was making is that Jesus also says in this passage that we should "put our life on the line for our friends" (thanks, The Message). Anyway, with this topic came the idea of being transparent (which I have determined I will from this point forward call "being like tape" or "being tape like") and how difficult that can be in life. It was an interesting conversation on the heels of all the other conversations I have had with my friends who, in general, I feel like I can be very tape like with.
I'm not one that can sit and talk about the weather for very long--I don't want to talk about trivial things --I want to talk about life and where we are in this whole messy, ridiculous world. Some people appreciate that, others probably think I'm crazy...which, I guess, is alright. Anyway, my point, is that I appreciate people that can be transparent...I'm a lot like that myself. I find myself annoyed sometimes with people that put up this wall, because, let's be honest, we all have weird stuff floating through our heads and we don't particularly want people to see the yuck we have behind those "Doin' great!" comments we pass on as we walk by people in the hall. (Please know, that if I ask "how are you?" I really want to know if you want me to know. I don't want you to say "great" if life sucks at that point. I want to always try to have time to listen if someone needs an ear...) I also have been burned beyond reason for opening myself up because it isn't reciprocated and its difficult to lay yourself on the line and have someone continue to just give you the "basics." Jay Strother often says that the small group ministries at church are opportunities to "do life together" and I don't see the point in " doing life together" if you aren't going to be honest and real with someone. But, that's just me.
If you think about Scotch tape, it can hold things together or up, help repair things that have been broken, move pencil markings from one piece of paper to another piece of paper, remove sharpie from a dry erase board. All of these things are positive. They are making a change in something (most likely for the better). It can also hurt like heck if its yanked off part of your arm where hair is, or if it gets stuck in your hair and you have to pull it out. It can be frustrating to make sure it doesn't wad up on itself and become useless in aiding you in piecing something together or holding something up. It shows your finger prints if you put your finger on the sticky part... All of those things are negative, but you still see a result...even if the result is it being thrown in the trash can.
So what if we tried to live our lives more like scotch tape? Whether what we are letting people see is positive or negative, we're still allowing people in and letting them see what's happening in our world. And by allowing them to do that, they are taking the things they have to offer and putting them in our lives too. And the things they have to offer may help us in our journey...may make that yank of pulling the tape out of your hair a little easier...and the putting of the ripped pages back together more joyful.
Maybe I'm taking this whole tape thing to a level that it doesn't need to go to, but for me, it was something I needed to hear.
I hope I am someone that people feel like they can look like tape with...I hope and pray my heart and my head will know how to handle situations when someone needs to be a little Scotchy. I hope others will know how to deal with me when I need to be a little Scotchy.
Who knows, maybe "Scotchy" will be in the dictionary one day and it will have my name beside it. :)
Its all apart of the journey.
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